Sat, Dec. 23rd, 2006, 05:33 pm
An open letter:
We've never talked, or we don't talk much, and I'm unsure as to how to start. Maybe it's fear, or just an excess of caution, but instead of directly approaching you, I wrote this up, and hoped it would get to you, or by pure social chance, happen to have some effect on you.
I've been watching you for a couple of years now, even though you haven't noticed me. You are an interesting person, and have always left me impressed with your abilities and thoughts. Even though I don't approach you, online or off, I still want to let you know that, leaving me conflicted. So, I wrote this up, and hoped it would get to you, or by some trick of fate, have some effect on you.
Maybe I'm afraid of displeasing you, or that our exchanges will somehow be unpleasent, or that I somehow will give you some mental disease, like how you're not supposed to touch baby birds, and you'll be touched by darkness. Maybe by thinking this way, by playing it safe, I'm denying other possiblities, for fear of the worst. Instead, I wrote this, even though you haven't noticed me, I wrote this up, and hoped you might find it, or that, somehow, its message would carry through to you.
Sun, Dec. 24th, 2006 04:23 am (UTC)
I love the broadcast nature of this message. It's like condensed Hi-I'm-shy-but-thanks. Very nice, well played. Good for all occasions, really.
Sun, Dec. 24th, 2006 04:39 am (UTC)
The only caution I have about this message is, while it's a truly excellent sentiment and made me smile... in my experience damn near everybody sits on their hands and thinks, "Well, he can't possibly mean me
, and if I stand up and recognize it, I'll sound presumptuous. So I'll just sit here and hope this altogether swell person and I get a pretense to talk to each other... someday." Mamihlapinatapai.
As a confessional, this message is awesome. As an icebreaker, just make sure to leave an explicit clause for us ordinary folks to reach out and hug you, too, without picking up the weighty mantle of "interesting person." :) I know you've always been high on the list of people I've wanted to get to know better, though we've just kinda danced on each other's peripheries for years...
Also, ^______^ and thank you for saying this. If it's any consolations, I've gotten myself stuck for YEARS in feelings like you're describing, hesitating for too long to approach people I've liked, and any step in the direction of getting people closer is a good one.
Sun, Dec. 24th, 2006 08:24 am (UTC)
Bah, you were
that person for about a year until axonfuel
Of The Everchanging Name bullied me into finally talking to you. As I said to Moment, why hasn't events like that encouraged me to get out there and talk to the people? Damn you, Saint Skinner, I'm not operating on my environment at all!
Sun, Dec. 24th, 2006 05:56 am (UTC)
Well, can't be me, I'm not interesting. :) What is interesting is that I suspect this message could be reciprocal across nearly half my friendslist..
Sun, Dec. 24th, 2006 07:21 am (UTC)
Well, if the channel is open, I can feel free to say things like, 'Damn, Mome, you're awesome', 'the newest Nacona came out really well' and 'how's the stupid holiday season treating you?'
Actually, you've hit on something. I type a lot a lot a lot a lot of comments, a portion of which actually gets posted. The rest, I scrap because I don't they're up to some sort of invisible standard, or some other trepidation-cream-filled chocolate-coated-crazy reason. Only half of the things I say make it past my patented 'Self-Defeating Pschic Social Filter: Now With Port And Bow Attatchments!' You'd imagine I'd learn to relax in light of past successes, and you'd imagine entirely wrong -- I'm an eversteady rock of social awkwardness. :]
When I wrote that post, I was thinking of the dozens of people I want to get to know, in real life and online, or rather just be 'let in', but I'm afraid of rejection and... disapointing them, I guess?
The reason I wrote it was because I figured it would strike a cord. If it didn't, I would have gone Red Queen mad. (Hey, my sense of style would improve, though. I need to work on that...)
Sun, Dec. 24th, 2006 03:44 pm (UTC)
To which I can reply "Nono, the awesome, it is you!" and "Damn, somebody actually reads
it?! Wow!" and "It's stomping on my head with steel-toed Santa boots with every Ho, Ho, Ho!" :)
Hmm. You do that too, huh? (Writing comments then not posting them.) So many reasons why..
Well, once you actually contact people and say "Hi, I'd like to know you and chat more!" then.. you have to keep up that level of interactivity. And that's so tiring sometimes...
Definitely struck a chord. Possibly struck the whole circle. :)
Sun, Dec. 24th, 2006 10:26 pm (UTC)
Yeah, some weeks I'm hardly even here, spending all my time at some studio, job, reading for classes, and running other errands. I feel guilty about it and come back a few days later, and then I don't know what to say. It's that moment of being so caught up in a different world, where communicating isn't as important as what you're doing with your body. It's hard to re-emmerse after a few busy days, I'm no good at juggling the two. That's why people go on LJ hiatusi, I think. It's my
Sun, Dec. 24th, 2006 06:10 am (UTC)
raiblu: Irrelevant, this is.
My comment I mean. But I find this is a good way to get ahold of people. ... yeah, I know I dun complained about the comment-catchin' before, but I can't think of a better way. We need to talk about things. Mainly, what your address is. :3 So I can send a thing or two...
An' if anyone is staying up there for the summer. o.O
Sun, Dec. 24th, 2006 07:11 am (UTC)
masstreble: OUT LOUD ON THE INTERNET I PROCLAIM IN SANS-SERIF FONTS:
1213 Hess Ave Apt 2
Fairbanks AK, 99709
Note to stalkers: now's the time, I'm lonely and
Summuh. Summuh. Well, Chris won't be here, neither will I, even though we have the apartment. Chris may have an awesome relevant job down in Arizona, and I'm assured at least one well-paying job in Palmer.
This comment has a high concentration of personal information, eh?
Sun, Dec. 24th, 2006 08:51 am (UTC)
quietgladness: Re: OUT LOUD ON THE INTERNET I PROCLAIM IN SANS-SERIF FONTS:
I AM TOTALLY GOING TO WRITE TO YOU!
Ps. You have an awesome
Sun, Dec. 24th, 2006 09:45 am (UTC)
masstreble: Re: OUT LOUD ON THE INTERNET I PROCLAIM IN SANS-SERIF FONTS:
Written correspondance! That still happens?
Mon, Dec. 25th, 2006 06:07 am (UTC)
ghostangel: Re: OUT LOUD ON THE INTERNET I PROCLAIM IN SANS-SERIF FONTS:
Me too Me tooooo! *jumps up and down* :D Though I can't promise you'll be able to read my handwriting >_>;
Mon, Dec. 25th, 2006 09:09 am (UTC)
sparksol: Re: Buncha caps
Yep. Writing's gonna happen.
And your note is scarily similar to my situation in several particulars. But not all of them.
Tue, Dec. 26th, 2006 02:40 am (UTC)
taliabear: Re: OUT LOUD ON THE INTERNET I PROCLAIM IN SANS-SERIF FONTS:
Alaska! Brr, I'm too Southern for Alaska. I would die of um...lack of mosquitoes or something. Too much blood in the system. *nods wisely*
Tue, Dec. 26th, 2006 12:13 pm (UTC)
masstreble: Re: OUT LOUD ON THE INTERNET I PROCLAIM IN SANS-SERIF FONTS:
In the spring and summer, we have mosquitoes unlike any you've ever seen. Oh, we have mosquitoes, starting with the ones that hibernated: big, slow, and stupid. Later ones depend on the species, but we have these gigantic brown ones that are sometimes mistaken for strangely spindly aenemic house-cats. There's a joke about the mosquitoe being the state bird. (It's not. It's the ptarmigan.)
At the moment, though, we're free from them. For now.
Tue, Dec. 26th, 2006 04:10 pm (UTC)
Your welcome Sam, But I can't for the life of me think why you'd want to know me more.... unless of course you want to know me more in a biblical sense... and I'm alright with that ;)
Everyone loves me, and that's just the way things go.
(yeah I realize that this is monstorously old, but yeah, I havn't been on LJ in almost a month... or more.)